Shit My Dad Says - About Bushcraft and Car Camping

The Maine Outdoorsman's recent post Car Camping For Dummies  reminded me of this gentle piece of advice from one of my favourite outdoor writers:

“Leave the real wilderness out of account for the present; go to some pleasant woodland, within hail of civilization, and start an experimental camp, spending a good part of your time in learning how to wield an axe, how to build proper fires, how to cook good meals out of doors, and so forth. Be sure to get the privilege beforehand of cutting what wood you will need. It is worth paying some wood-geld that you may learn how to fell and hew. Here, with fair fishing and some small game hunting, you can have a jolly good time, and will be fitted for something more ambitious the next season.”

From CAMPING AND WOODCRAFT By H. Kephart


Which in turn reminded me of the forthright nature of the advice and commentary offered by Sam Halpern (Justin's dad) in the hilarious record of the trials and tribulations of child-parent relations 'Shit My Dad Says'

"I’m not sure you can call that roughing it, son… Well, for one, there was a fucking minivan parked forty feet from your sleeping bags.”


Sam Halpern is, without doubt, the least passive aggressive person in the world, and that makes him a great dad in my book.


SBW


PS Am I the only one having endless formatting errors in the new blogger layouts?

Forks and Roasting - Online!

I've been a fan of, and occasional poster on, the bushcraftuk.com site for a couple of years now, and while it's full of really useful information, it's much like human nature itself; a mix of the good the bad and the ugly. It's also not short of moments of high comedy

There are some people who can't seem to think about bushcraft without buying yet more tat to drag around with them.

(sound of glass house resident throwing stones)

As a wise man once said 'there's a seeker born every minute, two to teach him, and another two to sell him 'must have' accessories on the internet'

The Swedish company Light My Fire sells some really cool stuff, but sometimes people get a bit carried way and 'it's a really cool idea' gets confused with 'it's going to be a really cool product'. You know what sales and marketing people are like.

(another stone flies past)

This toasting fork is a case in point. You get some wire and you bend it, it becomes a really sweet way of keeping the bread, sausage, or marshmallow stable on the end of your stick while you're toasting it over the fire. It's not rocket science - but it is the kind of cool idea that the internet is so good for sharing. Barry Crump would be proud of you.

A chap whose forum name on bushcraftuk is Cobweb has gone to the trouble of posting a straightforward tutorial showing exactly how to make one in 12 photos. Nice one mate.

Then follow 3 pages of sad, angry men telling each other how each of them believes they know best. After a while the guy who started the site asks them to play nice, they don't listen!
It's hilarious! Boys and their toys! What can you say?

thanks for reading
SBW

PS the toasting forks absolutely rock - and are very very easy to make
PPS have a look at the silly poll I posted about an English TV show and the responses it got!

Breakfast - It's All Good This Weekend

This one you gotta try!!

American readers will already know this, so this post is really for those of us not residing in the USA. America leads the world at breakfasting, really, and here's for why...

It's not just a legend, there really are special breakfast beers brewed in Germany, a wonderful idea, shows real imagination, but no. It's not quite what I'm looking for.
A croissant, even a chocolate stuffed croissant or pan au chocolat, washed down with a bowl of hot chocolate is good. But not good enough.
The 'full English' while a fine thing in itself could do with a few additions. Those additions hail from the US. The American take on the pancake, all risen and fluffy is a wonderful thing too, and may well become the subject of a future blog, but this post and this weekends breakfasts are dedicated to the majesty of the Biscuit.

By biscuit I don't mean the English word for cookies, I mean the half way house between bread and scones that ANYONE can make in TEN MINUETS. Transforming themselves at a stroke from kitchen lummox to culinary hero in less time than it took me to write this post. TRUE.

I've eaten biscuit with American family's and in dinners loads of times but it never occurred to me just how easy they are to make.Until I read A Proper Breakfast by GWH (the Great White Hunter). His recipe cannot over state just how easy they are to make!

Shortening isn't that easy to come by in the UK so I use vegetable suet which all the big supermarkets sell. You'll find it in the baking section it looks like this


The only things I would add are;
Don't make them too thin. At first I was nervous of making them too doughy and rolled them a little thinner than the recommended three quarters of an inch, as soon a I started to roll them out a little thicker I got a perfect biscuits.
A sponge tin (round and not very deep) is perfect for making one large biscuit which you can serve slices of.

This weekend you're a hero, even if it's only until the end of the meal!
Thanks for reading
SBW

PS This summer while camping out, at the music festivals or later in the year at deer camp, this recipe makes a good alternative to banock -you can mix and bag the dry ingredients and take them with you. While the others are lamenting the state of the squished, soggy loaf they brought with them, you can bake your biscuit in a Dutch oven over the fire. How bushwacker will you look then!