Fishing The River Usk Pt4

Look everyone SBW's rod is overshadowed by Lord Hereford's Knob

Every hobby starts with a hat, when stalking deer hats keep you warm and give you something to catch the rounds in when you unload the rifle, when fishing they keep off the sun [and more usually the rain]. Here I'm using a Sombrero as a training aid, the brim largely prevents overhead casting, entraining me in the art of the 'scrappy side cast' which will may put a fly under the overhanging bushes and trees which line the banks of the tributaries.

Opps that's another half hour untangling!

While we're on the subject of untangling I'm not sure if fishing causes divorce but its certainly one of its benefits, various chaps we invited to join us were 'mysteriously' busy after expressing initial enthusiasm.  As we canvased our friends looking for accomplices to join us on the trip, I noticed a new found unpopularity; with our talk of new GF's and fishing trips we were perhaps sounding a little too much like an escape committee, or at the very least Rebel Forces. To be crushed under the jackboots of the Empire.

For those of you who value a committed partnership AND fishing here's a few words of advice:

It’s a stunning summers morning. Three guys are fishing a Trout stream

Guy One:
“You have no idea what I had to promise the mrs to be here. I’m painting BOTH the kids rooms next weekend.”

Guy Two:
“That’s nothing I’m weeding the garden, BEFORE I reorganise her mother’s garage”.

Guys One and Two:
“What did you have to promise”?

Guy Three:
“Suckers, same as last week, I just set the alarm for 3am when it goes off I give her a nudge and say her Frolicking or Fishing? She said ‘Wear a hat, it’s cold out there’”.

On the subject of 'Conchita has left me' and hats. For those of us of a certain age, the Sombrero will always be synonymous with the now much missed 'Bandit' bar of our youth. Remember this one?



More soon
Your pal
SBW

Our Friend's In The North

A great picture by James of me sitting at the bench - Rangetastic!
Have all the 'crack shot' jokes been made already?

With the new year begining; the economy sliding, Google soaking up all the advertising budgets, loafer wearing smart arses not being in demand the way we once were, and me and the gorgeous Mrs SBW no longer an item, I've decided give myself a kick up the arse and to go to school.

Psychology and Law both sounded like tempting vocations, but the whole 'poor student' thing just isn't practical. So I'm going to save the world - one house at a time.

As a culture we're at the crossroads where the 'Big Brains and Opposable Thumbs' experiment is about to be tested, possibly to destruction. A deregulated derivatives market has just been tested to destruction and even some of the less imaginative voices are starting to talk about peak oil either having already happened or being more than a 'penciled' appointment. While MCP and quite a few of my off-grid chums see only doom and gloom, I see a massive opportunity. One where we'll re-float the financial system and free ourselves from fossil fuels; by a massive swing to locally generated energy and the responsible/ingenious deployment of the resources we have. I'm prepared to bet the next ten years of my life on it. So its off to trade school in the frozen north, (or "Leeds" as the locals pronounce it) to brush up on my plumbing and electrical skills. While I'm there I plan to get time for some outdoor adventures with TNM. The beautiful county of Yorkshire (Englands Texas) offers plenty of chances for us to get up close and personal with our dinner. Although Ferret Legging isn't and wont be on the agenda.

In honor of my new workplace, under a kitchen sink rather than behind a desk, here's my favorite builders joke - The Intellectual Building Site

There's an English guy living in Eire, has no money, so he thinks 'I'd better get a job' so he goes to a nearby building site to ask the foreman if they have anything for him.

Foreman: "Well thanks for coming down and askin'. I'd like to give you a shout, I really would, because i like to think of myself as a fair man. And that's the reason I'd only be fair if i gave you a warning first. This IS the intellectual building site, and although I'm sure you're a nice fella and all, it'd be only fair if i warned you, I've not been a fan of the education system in your country since they phased out the eleven plus. This is the intellectual building site, we start with the crossword in the London Times with our breakfast, at the first break we do the crossword from the Irish Times and by lunchtime my nephew has faxed us the New York Times crossword. So if you don't get in you mustn't be too hard on yourself, its no reflection on you as a person, it might be that you just weren't smart enough or your education just wasn't good enough. Remember this is the intellectual building site."

English guy: "Sounds fair whats the question?"

Foreman: "What's the difference between a girder and a joist?"

English guy: "That's easy Goethe wrote Faust and Joyce wrote Ulysses!"

A VERY HAPPY NEW YEAR TO YOU ALL

Your pal
The bushwacker.
PS Just think how much weight I've lost to have my pants hang down like that!

Once Again - Tis The Season To Be Silly

I received this one in my email yesterday, and having nothing more meaningful to write about, its ended up being today's post.

I am passing this on to you because it definitely worked for me. In these interesting times, we all could probably use more calm or inner peace in our lives. A doctor on breakfast television this morning said that the way to achieve inner peace is to finish all the things you have started. So I looked around my house to see things I'd started and hadn't finished and, before leaving the house this morning, I finished off a bottle of Merlot, a bottle of Shhhardonay, a bodle of Baileys, a butle of vocka, a pockage of Prunglies, tha mainder of bot Prozic and Valum scriptins, the res of the Chesescke an a box a chocolets. Yu haf no idr who fkin gud I fel. Peas sen dis orn to dem yu fee AR in ned ov inr pece
Ho Ho Ho

Your Pal
The Bushwacker

Rogue's Hat

It’s a stunning summers morning. Three guys are fishing

Guy One:
“You have no idea what I had to promise the mrs to be here.
I’m painting BOTH the kids rooms next weekend.”

Guy Two:
“That’s nothing I’m weeding the garden, BEFORE I reorganise her mother’s garage”.

Guys One and Two:
“What did you have to promise”?

Guy Three:
“Suckers, I just set the alarm for 5am when it went off I gave her a nudge and asked her Frolicking or Fishing?
She said ‘Wear a hat it’s cold out there’”.

Heirloom quality hat £25. For the rakish angler
They do a whole range of different styles and some amazing boots

PS. The hat came with a great little pamphlet that said
"If you're attacked by a wild animal throw your hat on the ground. It wont save your life, but the person who finds it will thank you"

Bushwacker.